


Always Be Prepared

by Kass



Category: due South
Genre: DS_Flashfiction, First Time, M/M, items fraser carries challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-02-07
Updated: 2009-02-07
Packaged: 2017-10-02 05:26:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kass/pseuds/Kass
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Fraser turned back to me, one of his hands was ghost-white. He was wearing a glove. And he was unscrewing a little tin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Always Be Prepared

**Author's Note:**

> For the Items Fraser Carries challenge at DS Flashfic.

  
I don't know if they have Boy Scouts in Canada, but if they do, Fraser must've been one. I don't know jack about scouting except the motto, but nobody in the world is more prepared than Fraser.

I should've known.

Here's the thing: I'm a chickenshit for doing it the way I did. I had a hardon for Fraser from the start. Plus there was something lonely about him, and I've always been a sucker for somebody who might have a hole in his heart that I could work my way into.

But the physical stuff? All I had to do was think about thinking about it and my palms started sweating, and not in the good way, either. It was halfway to a panic attack.

Wasn't supposed to matter, though, because I wasn't going to bring it up. I had all these reasons why.

Over time, they vanished. Fraser wasn't straight, not enough to mind. Once we got past the Henry Allen I knew he wasn't going to hit me again, no matter what came out of my mouth. And speaking of the Henry Allen: that buddy-breathing thing...?

Nah, I wasn't going to be rejected. He was waiting for me to make a move.

And I was scared out of my mind.

I can talk a good game, but I'd never done anything with a guy. I didn't know what I was doing.

It wasn't that it repelled me. It was more like a train wreck: I didn't want to look, but once I started thinking about it, it would stay in my brain. Behind my eyelids. And I would go to pieces.

I knew a guy who was afraid of needles. I went with him to get his first tattoo. The minute he sat down in the chair he passed out. Ron wouldn't ink him like that; we had to wake him up with smelling salts, and he thrashed around when he came to. I had to get half a flask of Beam into him before he'd sit still for it.

I felt kind of like that. I knew what I wanted, but there was a wall of complete terror between here and there.

So when I finally decided to say something, I picked my moment. I got a long weekend's leave and asked Fraser to come camping up in Wisconsin. Once I poured my heart out we'd have a few days to fool around, but we wouldn't do anything too heavy, because Fraser would never have unsafe sex and we wouldn't have any supplies. It was genius.

We parked the car at the trailhead and hiked into the park. Dief ran around like he was on speed, sniffing things and barking and being the picture of happy dogginess, or wolfitude, and I let Fraser lead so I could watch his ass. Hey, I'm shallow sometimes.

After dinner we sat next to the fire, on a blanket, looking at stars. Even though I'd been thinking about it for months now, I still didn't have the right words, so I blurted out, "Fraser, can I kiss you?"

Nothing fazes Fraser. He just smiled and said, "Of course, Ray." And that was that.

It was good kissing, just like I knew it would be. We didn't have to talk about it; his tongue was in my mouth, and my hand was in his hair, and it was perfect.

We eased our way down onto the blanket and wrapped our legs together and kept going. We'd pull back, and smile at each other, and kiss some more. And it wasn't long before Fraser was hard, and I was hard, and that was perfect, because there was nothing to be afraid of.

But then he was working a hand into my jeans and muttering in my ear, "I hope you weren't planning on sleeping."

"Whyzat?" My dick liked the attention, even if my brain was waking back up.

"I have plans for you..." His voice was low and his tongue touched the edge of my ear and part of me wanted to come right there.

But another part of me was starting to freak out, so I nipped it in the bud. "We don't have any...you know...stuff." I moved to kiss him again.

"Stuff?" Fraser had pulled back a little. The firelight was just strong enough for me to see the bafflement on his face.

I took a deep breath. "You-know-condoms-whatever." There.

Fraser's face brightened; he was practically beaming. "Wait right there."

What the...?

No way had he brought condoms. No fucking way. I mean, there was something kind of endearing about the thought of him carrying them around waiting for me to ask (and something kind of hot about it, too, but I pushed that thought as far away as I could) but it just didn't seem right. I couldn't imagine him going into a drugstore and asking the surly kid at the counter for a package of...what? Trojans? Extra-thin? Lubricated? Ribbed?

His body tackled me to the blanket and we were kissing again. I meant to ask, but he was on top of me, his hands holding my head steady, and I stopped thinking. We were thrusting. Rubbing. Greatness.

When he moved away I made a little sound of dismay. "I want to see you," he said softly, and suddenly that sounded like a really good idea. Maybe I could watch him touch himself.

I swallowed hard and stripped. Beside me, Fraser did the same. I was aching for a look at his dick.

And then I heard a...plastic snapping sound.

I sat bolt upright, my heart pounding.

When Fraser turned back to me, one of his hands was ghost-white. He was wearing a glove. And he was unscrewing a little tin.

"What -- wait, Fraser, what's --" My voice came out too high-pitched. I was starting to sweat. My erection was deflating. Visions of prostate exams were dancing in my head, and that was not a good thing.

"Homemade liniment, Ray," he said, as though it were the most natural thing in the world.

"But--" There was a lump in my throat.

He set the thing down and looked at me. I could see him seeing that I was tense, putting the pieces together. I looked at the blanket. God, I hadn't thought this through. I'd fucked this up.

"Ray, you --" He sounded scared himself now. "Are you a...survivor?"

It took me a second to process. "Jeez! No, I just -- I don't know what we're doing."

His body relaxed; he looked relieved. "You're afraid."

I flinched, I couldn't help it, even though there was no condemnation in his voice. I had to swallow hard before I could say "Yeah."

Slowly Fraser lay back down on the blanket. "Can we go back to...?" He beckoned with his non-gloved hand.

This time the kissing started slower. Gentler. It was a while before my tongue went back in his mouth, but when it did, he gasped, and when I heard that, I was hard again. Thank God.

After a while I climbed on top of him. I liked the way our chests felt together, and fucking his mouth with my tongue made him writhe under me and I liked that even better. My panic was a million miles away.

I slid forward to suck at his neck, and his hands found my ass, and that was cool, that was good.

And then one of his hands was rubbing little circles and that was very cool, actually that was cold and slick and sending sparks up my spine. He wasn't rubbing in, just little tiny movements on the outside, and some far-away part of my brain noticed I wasn't panicking this time. I was harder than ever. And thrusting against his hip. And making little whimpery noises into the side of his neck.

"This okay?" he murmured somewhere near my ear, and I nodded into his shoulder. "Ray? Is this okay?"

I took a deep breath. "Yes." And then, screwing my eyes shut tight, "please."

"Trust me?"

I managed "mmm," which wasn't exactly a yes but was as close as I could get, and I was praying that he would understand because I didn't think I could say it out loud but all of a sudden I wanted whatever he was doing, wherever he was going, I wanted it bad.

Fraser rolled us onto our sides and scooted down my body a little, so his face was pressed into my ribcage and his hands could reach. His tongue was warm and it distracted me and then suddenly his slick finger was inside me. Still moving in little circles.

It wasn't like anything I'd ever imagined. My dick was so hard I almost hurt.

"Okay?" His voice was muffled against my body.

All I could do was moan.

"I'll take that as a yes," he said, and then two fingers pressed into me and I groaned and convulsed and came.

I was only dimly aware of Fraser's fingers pulling out of me; of the sound of the glove being peeled away and discarded; of the night sky over us. My whole body was tingling.

He lay down next to me again and propped himself up on one elbow, looking at me. "Was that all right?"

I didn't know how to answer. It was terrifying. It was amazing. So I pushed up next to him and kissed him again.

He sighed into my mouth, and somehow that freed me up. "God, yes, I want to do that again." Admitting it didn't feel as earthshattering as I thought it would. I worked a hand between us and ran it over his dick.

Fraser shuddered. "Oh--good," he got out, between his teeth. "I was--worried I'd--pushed you too far--"

There was something incredibly sexy about listening to him try to talk when he was obviously on the verge of losing it. I took my hand away and licked it, and his head thudded back against the ground.

About two seconds after that he was jerking under me, biting his lip to keep from making any noise. I couldn't stand it: I licked his bottom lip and he opened his mouth and moaned right into me.

It was almost enough to make me hard again.

Somehow we got off the blanket and into the tent. Fraser spread out my sleeping bag on the ground and covered us with his other blanket, the one that wasn't sticky now.

By the time we arranged ourselves comfortably, I was wide awake again.

I had to ask.

"You always carry that stuff with you?"

It was too dark to tell whether he was blushing, but I think he might've been. "It's good to be prepared, Ray."

I snorted. "I'll say."

"I'm glad you agree." He sounded so proud of himself I would've hit him with a pillow, if we had any.

I settled for kissing him again.


End file.
